Stag Weekends by location
You defo don't want a DIY stag do disaster so let us do the donkey work for your stag party and avoid looking like an ass in front of your mates. Be honest, you've never done anything on this scale, have you? Finding out what to do and where to stay is one thing, negotiating great deals along the way as well as working out a timetable that works is another. Then when you have to hand over a huge wedge of cash to hopefully make it all happen it soon becomes pretty scary stuff!
So what could possibly go wrong?
- The deposit for your digs disappears
- You spend the night queuing not clubbing
- You're hard up 'cos Bob hasn't stumped up
- The hotel stopped any Stag shenanigans
- For lap-dancing read crap-dancing
- The extreme stuff was pretty duff
- The weekend leaves you tagged as a tosser
Sorting out a whole weekend of mayhem can be complicated but we can make it swift, simple and for surprisingly little cash. So swerve all the slip-ups and get GoBananas onside to ensure a weekend to remember!
Good reasons to go with GoBananas
- Payments are fully protected
- We can clinch keener deals than you can
- Get on the guest list and kiss the queues goodbye
- Clinch everything for just a few quid.
- Mates can pay their share online.
- Package deals or pick your own
- Wild or mild weekend - you choose
- One place to pay the lot
- Easy to alter your plans
Frantic Friday has arrived and the squad are all fired up and good to go. First off find the hotel to dump the gear. The signs don't look too good - 'No Dogs' 'No Stags' 'No Licence' - no licence! No beer, no shots, no fun. So that'll be No to Nonsense as well and the weekend well and truly bombed out. But hey hang on, here we are. Wow, this looks class, and it's close to the clubs too. Receptionist looks cool, hope she's up for....well we'll probably find out later. Bet Stags turn up starkers in the foyer all the time. Or we could all turn up starkers except the Stag. She didn't even flinch when she saw that full roll of pallet wrap ...... . but that's for later, time to hit the pubs and clubs.
How good is that, a bus with banging tunes, babes and a pole...result! They're cool with the carryout too, way to go! We're here but look at the size of that queue, man it snakes right arounds the building, we'll be stuck here for ages and it's pissing down. Ace, we've got straight in, right past these poor sodden sods. Hey shooters, good start, how much? Free? Excellent! Loving the atmosphere in here, might never have found this place, being tucked away up this side street.
What's that whistle for? Oh right, back on the bus with no worries about stragglers. Something else I can leave to someone else. Bit distracted anyway, never been on a bus with a built-in pole for dancing. Shame there are no girls using it but Dave looks like he's enjoying being cling-wrapped to the pole. Next stop we'll just leave him there but bring back on board a few special cocktails to keep him fuelled up.
That was an epic night. Just as well we're not crashing somewhere miles out of town, this place has a brilliant location. Hope the cleaners don't crap themselves when they find Dave duct-taped to the dining table in the staff room. They'll probably have something that can remove that glue and glitter concotion, even from his pubic hair - probably. Not sure about that cheap fake tan though. Rooms spinning a bit, wonder if the dining table is.
Think Dave's getting quite a taste for lager and cornflakes, not that he had much option on what he was going to eat. Like feeding a giant plastic slug. Might unwrap him for a shower before we head off for the fun stuff. Better be quick as the minibus comes soon, miles better than trying to find where the Zorbing is. Liking the idea of keeping my licence, no way could I drive anywhere today, I was blasted last night! Amazed how I avoided the mother of all hangovers.
Well as technicolour yawns go Dave's was pretty epic. Amazing how it spread around the inside of that Zorb ball sphere thing, and how much of it ended up on Mike. Shouldn't have been late for breakfast, now he has to buddy up with Dave all day - unlucky! White water rafting next, don't think Dave is quite done yet - we'll soon see.
Ok, the water was a good thing in that it washed off the puke, but Dave's fake tan face is more green now than orange - wonder why! More worrying was the fact I nearly crapped myself on the way down but boy, what an adrenalin rush.
Man is Dave petrified! He's tightly tied up and blindfolded. He thinks he's in a tattoo parlour and he's not wrong. He's totally convinced something embarassing is about to be added to his precious sleeve and, yes, he's not wrong about that either. A cheesey heart with Dave and Diana (his girfriends name is Sue)? Nah, we've had a blast so all he's getting inked is the date and Dave the Legend because we're all agreed that's what he is.
He's dead chuffed and not dead set on revenge, or so he says. His deadpan orange and still greenish face isn't betraying anything but I'm certain the lap-dancing and the strippers lined up for tonight will keep his mind occupied. The restaurant put on an impressive spread and kept the lager flowing until the bus arrived again so here we are again.
Dave's not pinned to the pole I am. Not sure why but hey I'm happy. I'm not only cling-wrapped tight to the pole but tight to Paula, who isn't complaining. Guys, what's the blindfold for? Guys I'm not the Stag....c'mon guys.....guys?
Now don't dick about, get dialling now and fix up the date you and your mates want!